Side Notes

DISAPPOINTMENT

People in your life are going to disappoint you, as you are going to disappoint other people. Its important to do the best you can, but lets face it, nobody is perfect. Surround yourself people who are cheering for you, but the ones who are against you are important too- those are the people who are going to challenge you and push you to be more. I've realized my own expectations are higher than anybody else's. I think this is what makes us push to be so successful in the things we think are important, but also why it hits us so hard when we let ourselves down. I've learned that the failures are just as important than the wins. We can learn so much from our failures, and I believe that failures also build character. The people who succeed the most in life are the people who have been through the ringer and back- and survived. 

Life is always going to throw challenges at you. And sometimes you are going to feel like you can't take it- like you can't possibly survive it. Something that I’ve believed to be true is that: Things have a way of working themselves out. Not always in the way you expect, or the way you want. We can't always control the things that happen to us, but we can decide how we are going to let it affect us. Some of the most beautiful people I have met in my life are the people whom have been through the most. They are the survivors; proof that you can make it through things you never believed you could. I think the best way to deal with things is to face them. Notice I said the 'best' way, not the 'easy' way. I've found out that facing your problems, not running away- but running through them, is the most efficient way to work through problems. 

There are going to be times when you feel defeated. Everyone feels this in some way or another. But having feelings like this make us human. Life is full of both the good and the bad. But I think the bad helps us learn to appreciate the good. You don't know what you have until its gone. But how do we deal with these emotions? How do we 'get over it'? The way I’ve learned is to let those emotions be. Don't try to control or suppress them. Because it won't work. Think about it this way; you are a soda can and life is the hand that shakes you. If you don't let out the pressure inside you, after so many times, you are going to 'explode.' You need to deal with the pressure as it comes to let it go. So when you feel life has got you down, when it sucker-punches you in the gut, when you hurt in places you didn't even know existed, let it out. Cry. Scream. Go freaking crazy. And then, move on. 

MEMORIES

One day when I was younger I went with my mom to go grocery shopping. My family usually did grocery shopping on Saturdays. Saturdays were pretty crazy all the time. In the morning the girls went to ice skating practice and the boys went to karate practice. My dad was the cardio instructor for our ice skating teams, so he was usually with us until he went to the karate school. Whenever we finished cardio with my dad, we walked over to the South Rink for ice skating practice. I hated that rink. The building was not made of stone; it was more like a giant tent with an ice rink in it. So basically it was way colder in the winter. Here I am getting off track.

Anyway, so I went with my mom to the grocery store. We always had these elaborate lists my father made on some fancy excel sheet- so it was very systematic. I guess you kind of have to be that way with kids. So this particular shopping experience was not so different until we are in line to check out. In line in front of us were two boys maybe about 10 years old. Although unusual, I didn’t pay much attention. I tended to be an extremely active daydreamer as a kid; so I space out a lot. Still do sometimes. My mom was the one that made me start paying attention. The boys in front of us had a credit card that was declining- holding up the line. They looked panicked- like they didn’t know what to do. I mean- at their age I would freak out too. After they tried swiping it a few more times my mom stopped them and said- “I’ll pay for it.” I was so confused by all that was going on for some reason. This was the first real charitable act I ever remember seeing someone make. It didn’t make sense to me- why would someone do something for another person without gaining anything in return? Seeing my mother do that was so confusing. Regardless, the kids thanked my mom many times before taking their grocery bags and leaving. After we had all of our stuff bagged up, we walked into the parking lot. I finally decided to ask her why she bought their groceries. She said to me; “Because they had things like potpies and cereal. Its not like they were out for some snacks, they got food that they needed.” As we walked I pondered this. I was interrupted from my thoughts when a woman jumped out of a car and ran over and gave my mom a hug. “Mam, I want to thank you for what you did for my family. Its some hard times right now and I can’t tell you how much I appreciate what you did. Thank you so much.” My mom smiled and assured the woman- “I understand completely. We all need a little help sometimes.”

That is a memory I will remember forever. It seems like something so small but I think it opened up my mind, which was so small at the time. It was so cool to see my mom be a ‘hero.’ It makes me want to do something for someone like that. Hopefully, some day I will get the opportunity.